Are You Committed?

The past couple of days I’ve really been thinking a great deal about this word, commitment.  This semester is the last semester I have of classes before I do my student teaching and I’ve started to prepare my applications for graduate school.  I’ve sent the manuscripts of Book One “The Forgotten Spell” and half of Book Two “The Mirror Sliver” off to Laura Blum Guest of Mariposa Press in France, as she has taken the series under her wing, and agreed to represent Legends of Green Isle as an agent.  Things seems to be going pretty good, right.  Yet, there are always some kind of bumps in the highway of life.  Nothing is ever easy; I learned that a long time ago.  My bumps seem to becoming more frequent in that road.  Because of my school, I haven’t been able to work a normal 9 to 5 job.  I work little part-time gigs when I can fit them in.  Recently I spent a day in the hospital where I had to have numerous tests and so forth.  I don’t have great insurance, so I cringe every time I open the mailbox.  We haven’t been able to make our bills every month without robbing Peter to pay Paul, so the medical bills are going to throw another kink in the works.  I wonder how it’s going to be next semester when I won’t have my history intern job or my tutoring job at the school.  These thoughts bring me always back to that word commitment.

Are you committed Connie Wallace to see this to the end?  And how far does that commitment go?

Yes, that was me talking to myself as I stare at my notebook with my story outlines in them, waiting for me to write.  I heave a heavy sigh because right now I’m committed to graduating.  It would be easy to allow these bumps to get the better of me and just give up.  But I think of my boyfriend who gets up at 4:30 am every morning and drives two hours to work down in Atlanta and then drives the same distance home every night.  He is always committed.  I need to be the same way.

So, even though money, gas, food may be tight, I need to remind myself that I’m to be committed to finishing. I’m not a quitter. My commitment runs deep.  I set goals for myself a long time ago, that I wouldn’t leave this world until I managed to make some kind of mark in it.  Whether it be a small one or big one.   Let’s hope that the mark stays…as a testimony to my commitment.

 

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